Silly Sunday is hosted by Sandee, of Comedy Plus.
Silly Sunday is the place to come for weekly laughs. The rules are simple, just have fun.
This is a great opportunity to get to know other bloggers and have a laugh or two in the process.
Here is how it works: Laugh and Link Up!
1. Post a joke.
2. Link Up with the URL to your joke in the Linky Tools Widget.
3. Read my joke.
4. Leave a comment to tell me how much you enjoyed my joke.
5. Try and visit a few others participating in Silly Sunday.
6. Go to Sandee's site, linked above, and get the Silly Sunday code for your blog, too!
"Mom, does this look infected to you?"
No matter how old they get, they come to mom with those icky things, don't they? Bigger Girl did, with her ingrown toenail, and when i told her it did, in fact, look like it was starting to become infected, she almost panicked.
"I can't get on an antibiotic now, I just started donating my blood plasma, and they will make me sit out a month and they pay you for your time and I need the money!"
She managed to nip the infection in the bud with extra cleaning and nail care and a bit of a topical ointment, which apparently doesn't disqualify you from donating.
Tee Boudreaux din't have so much fortune, but it be okay. He were a bit sick, an' Clothile done take him to de traiteur [medicine man], Dr. Leger.
Dr. Leger done know how to make de young patient feel good, like he be de one cooperatin' wit' his own care, he talk to Tee, ax him how he feel, what be wrong, an' he ax, "Tee, be you allergic to ennyt'ing?"
An' Tee lean over an' whisper in his ear, an' he very careful write it down.
Den Dr. Leger done his examine, an' he write out de medicine fo' de herboristerie. Clothile know not to try to read what he write out, she jes' take it an' go get de medicine.
Well, Dr. Leger sure done listen, de medicine instruction done say, "Not to be taken wit' broccoli!"
Today is:
Canning Day -- get that harvest preserved! on the birth anniversary of Nicholas Appert, the French chemist who devised modern canning
Chulalongokorn Day -- Thailand (Rama V Day)
Commemoration of the Paris Peace Agreements of 1991 -- Cambodia
Day of the Macedonian Revolutionary Struggle -- Republic of Macedonia
Dia Nacional de la Aviacion -- Mexico (National Aviation Day)
Festival of Forgotten Gods -- so we don't offend anybody, i guess?
Festival of Selket and Ceremony of Thoth -- Ancient Egyptian Calendar (date approximate)
Finding of King Look Under Your Mattress Jubilee -- Fairy Calendar
Liberation Day -- Libya
Mother-in-Law Day -- a day to honor good Mothers-in-Law for their contributions to their families and for enduring all the bad jokes; if you have a lousy one, go listen to Ernie K-Doe's song
National Boston Cream Pie Day
National Day / Republic Day -- Hungary
National Mole Day -- US Chemists; from 6:02AM to 6:02PM, in honor of Avogadro's Number: 2016 theme, "Periodic Table of the EleMOLEments"
Respiratory Care Week begins -- recognizing the respiratory care profession and promoting awareness of lung health issues
Shemini Azteret -- Judaism (Jewish completion of the annual cycle of reading of the Torah; begins at sunset, through sunset tomorrow)
St. John of Capistrano's Day (Patron of judges, jurists, military chaplains)
Swallows Depart San Juan Capistrano Day -- after today, in spite of what you think, the natives will tell you that bird is not a swallow
TV Talk Show Host Day -- the way some of them behave, do they deserve a day? Well, I guess everyone is good for something, even if only for being a bad example! This one is for the birth anniversary of Johnny Carson, who certainly deserves recognition
Ueno Tenjin Matsuri -- Mie, Japan (festival and parade of oni gyoretsu -- demons or ogres -- dating back to the 16th century and said to halt plague, dispel illness, and ward off bad luck; through the 25th)
Birthdays Today:
Keith Van Horn, 1975
Al Leiter, 1965
Dug Flutie, 1962
Randy Pausch, 1960
Nancy Grace, 1959
"Weird" Al Yankovic, 1959
Martin Luther King III, 1957
Dwight Yoakam, 1956
Ang Lee, 1954
Michael Crichton, 1942
Pele' 1940
Chi-Chi Rodriguez, 1934
Johnny Carson, 1925
Frank Rizzo, 1920
Gertrude Ederle, 1906
Gummo Marx, 1893
Adlai Stevenson, 1835
Nicholas Appert, 1752
Debuting/Premiering Today:
The iPod, 2001
"Shadowlands"(Play), 1989
"Pippin"(Musical), 1972
"Barefoot in the Park"(Play), 1963
Dumbo(Disney animated film), 1941
"The Fred Allen Show"(Radio), 1932
"The Squaw Man"(Play), 1914
"In Old Kentucky"(Play), 1893 (ran for 27 seasons)
"Prince Igor"(Opera), 1890
Today in History:
According to the calculations of Archbishop James Ussher and based on the Bible, Creation begins, BC4004
Second Battle of Philippi, Brutus defeated by Octavian and Marc Antony, Brutus commits suicide, BC42
The Jews of Barbados are forbidden from engaging in retail trade, 1668
A revolt is held in Haarlem after a public ban on smoking, 1690
First Jewish prayer books printed in the US, 1760
The Continental Congress approves a resolution barring blacks from the army, 1775
Failed coup against the Emperor Napoleon, 1812
The first plastic surgery is performed, in England, 1814
72 Senators are summoned by Royal Proclamation to serve as the first members of the Canadian Senate, 1867
The New Orleans Mint reopens as an assay office, 1876
The First National Horseshoe Throwing Championship is held in Kellerton, Iowa, 1915
The first North American transcontinental air service begins between New York City and Los Angeles, California, 1929
Husband and wife Dr. Carl Cori & Dr. Gerty Cori are awarded joint Nobel Prizes, 1947
An underground earthquake traps 174 miners in the No. 2 colliery at Springhill, Nova Scotia, the deepest coal mine in North America at the time; only 100 were rescued, 1958
A United Nations sanctioned cease-fire officially ends the Yom Kippur War between Israel and Syria, 1973
Emperor Akihito becomes the first Emperor of Japan to stand on Chinese soil, 1992
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and Palestinian Chairman Yasser Arafat reach a "land for peace" agreement, 1998
Apple unveils the iPod, 2001
The US CDC announces that, if current trends in diet and exercise continue, by 2050 1 of 3 American adults will have diabetes, 2010
To bolster their relationship, China and India sign a new border defense agreement, 2013
Good one, though I admit to being a littly slow getting it.
ReplyDeleteThose were great sayings. Loved the last one. Have a great Sunday.
ReplyDeleteI'll take Tee's broccoli. I love it.
ReplyDeletehaha!
ReplyDeleteBwahahahahahahahaha. I love your jokes. I love them a lot.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad your daughter took care of that infection by herself. Brilliant.
Have a fabulous Silly Sunday. ☺
Took me a minute to get it, but it was worth a chuckle or two. You must have million of these.
ReplyDeleteLoved it! :-)
ReplyDeleteLove those jokes.
ReplyDeleteGood one :)
ReplyDeleteFunny, funny, funny my good friend. I hope you enjoyed your Sunday? Smile, tomorrow is Monday. See ya.
ReplyDeleteCruisin Paul
What a fun blog hop! Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeletehttp://healthymomsmagazine.net