Fractured English at the Laundromat (Wordless Wednesday) and Words for Wednesday

(Because some people like Blogger and some like WordPress, i am putting the same content at both.  If you would prefer to read this on the other site, it is linked here.) 

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Linking up with Wordless Wednesday and Sandee's Comedy Plus.

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Words for Wednesday was begun by Delores and has become a moveable feast of word or picture or music prompts that encourages us to write stories, poems, or whatever strikes our fancy.    

This month, the prompts are being provided by River at Drifting Through Life.    

This week's words are:

1. middle

2. nought

3. obnoxious

4. plastic

5. queenly

6. regardless

and/or:

1. speechless

2. timber

3. underbelly

4. vanity

5. walked

6. machine

The owners WALKED in during the MIDDLE of one of their least favorite client's more OBNOXIOUS episodes.  

She, in her VANITY, thought her behavior was QUEENLY.  These outbursts that left the employees SPEECHLESS were the unseemly UNDERBELLY of being in that business, dealing with those you don't like and can't like because business depends on it.  That was also why the owners always did everything they could to make sure only they dealt with the likes of her.

Much as they would have liked to completely cut her out, they knew such thoughts were for NOUGHT.  She was the least favorite client and the wealthiest and most consistent, so each put on an almost MACHINE manufactured PLASTIC smile every time she came in.

She never saw through those smiles which they kept on REGARDLESS of how she behaved.

Only one member of the family ever allowed himself the relief of saying anything in private once she had left.  He would make movements with his hands as if he were chopping down a tree, then say, "TIMBER!  There went another shred of my dignity, downed like a sapling before the lumberjack's ax!" and everyone in the place would laugh.  Once humor had been restored this way, they were able to pick up the day and go on, glad to be done with her for a short time at least.

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Today is:

Armed Forces Day -- Poland

Asuncion Foundation Day -- Paraguay

Assumption of Blessed Virgin Mary -- Catholic Christian Holy Day of Obligation

    Related Observances

         Coeur d'Alene Indian Pilgrimage -- Coeur d'Alene's Old Mission State Park, Cataldo, ID, US

         Dormition of the Theotokos -- Eastern Orthodox, Oriental Orthodox, and Eastern Catholic Christian

         Ferragosto -- Italy (During the Roman Empire, a festival to Diana and a fertility and ripening celebration)

         Mother's Day -- Antwerp; Costa Rica

         National Acadians Day -- Acadians

         Virgin of Candelaria, patron of the Canary Islands -- Tenrife, Spain

         Irmandade da Nossa Senhora da Boa Morte Fiesta -- Bahia, Brazil (Festival of the Order of Our Lady of the Good Death)

         Festival of the Outremeuse -- Liege, Belgium

         Public Holiday or Publicly Observed -- Andorra; Austria; Belgium; Benin; Bosnia; Burkina Faso; Burundi; Cameroon; Cape Verde; Central African Republic; Chile; Colombia; Côte d'Ivoire; Croatia; Cyprus; East Timor; France; French Guiana; French Polynesia; Gabon; Gambia; Germany; Greece; Guadelupe; Guatemala; Guinea; Holy See; Hungary; Italy; Lebanon; Liechtenstein; Lithuania; Luxembourg; Macedonia; Madagascar; Malta; Martinique; Mauritius; Mayotte; Monaco; New Caledonia; Paraguay; Poland; Portugal; Reunion; Romania; Rwanda; Saint Barthelemy; Saint Martin; Saint Pierre et Miquelon; San Marino; Senegal; Seychelles; Slovenia; Spain; Switzerland; Togo; Vanuatu; Wallis and Fortuna     

Best Friend's Day -- sponsored by Thema Martin

Bon/Obon Festival -- Japan (biggest day of the festival in most parts of Japan)

Chauvin Day -- observed on Napoleon's birthday because his is unknown, the day is named for Nicholas Chauvin, whose blind devotion to Napoleon was immortalized in his name's use for absurdly intense attachments to any cause

Check the Chip Day -- the American Veterinary Medical Association reminds you to check your pet's microchip and make sure it is still working correctly and that the registration information is up to date    

Dia de la Ley Fundamental -- Equatorial Guinea (Constitution Day)

Eleusinian Mysteries -- Ancient Greek Calendar (through the 18th, dates approximate)

Festival of Vesta -- Ancient Roman Calendar (goddess of the hearth)

Fete Nationale -- Republic of the Congo (National Day/Independence Day)

Fool's Dance -- Japan (part of the Awa Dance Festival)

Independence Day -- India(1947)

Liberation Day -- both Koreas

    Gwangbokjeol -- South Korea

    Jogukhaebangui nal -- North Korea

Maras Diena -- Ancient Latvian Calendar (celebration of the goddess Mara, cognate of Mary)

Miss Crustacean Usa Beauty Pageant and Ocean City Crab Creep -- Ocean City, NJ, US (crowning the most beautiful and fastest tree crab on Earth)

National Day -- Lichtenstein (a/k/a Liberation Day [1945])

National Failures Day -- some websites say the 16th, and may i suggest a book called "Fail Better", a small quotations book about how failure is just the beginning.

National Lemon Meringue Pie Day

National Medical Dosimetrist's Day -- American Association of Medical Dosimetrists (medical radiation safety experts)    

National Mourning Day -- Bangladesh

National Relaxation Day -- sponsored by Sean Moeller of Clio, Michigan; if you call in sick to stay home and relax, blame him

Panama La Vieja Day -- Panama (Founding of Panama City)

Shoro Nagashi Nagasaki -- Nagasaki, Japan (floating lanterns are released into the harbor in honor of the ancestors)

Sproshinki -- Slavic Pagan Calendar (end of the hay harvest festival)

St. Tarcisius' Day (Patron of altar servers, first communicants)

Tuva Republic Day -- Tos-Bulak fields south of Kyzuk, Tuva, Russia (celebration of the Tuva Republic, a Naadam festival of Mongolian wrestling, horse racing, and archery; held by the Tuva people, the closest genetic relatives to the North and South American Native Peoples)

Wafaa El-Nil -- Egypt and Coptic Church ("Fidelity of the Nile", celebration of the annual of Flooding of the Nile River)

Anniversaries Today:

Woodstock, 1969

Buddy Holly marries Maria Elena Santiago, 1958

Panama Canal opens, 1914

Transcontinental US railway is completed at Promontory Point, UT, US, 1870

Birthdays Today:

Joe Jonas, 1989

Kerri Walsh, 1978

Ben Affleck, 1972

Debra Messing, 1968

Melinda Gates, 1964

Zeljko Ivanek, 1957

Princess Anne, Princess Royal of the United Kingdom, 1950

Jimmy Webb, 1946

Kathryn Whitmire, 1946

Linda Ellerbee, 1944

Stephen G. Breyer, 1938

Vernon Jordan, Jr, 1935

Phyllis Stewart Schlafly, 1924

Mike Connors, 1925

Oscar Emmanuel Peterson, 1925

Rose Marie, 1925

Huntz Hall, 1919

Oscar Romero, 1917

Julia Child, 1912

Elizabeth Bolden, American Supercentenarian, 1890 (d. 2006)

Edna Ferber, 1885

Ethel Barrymore, 1879

Charles Albert "The Old Roman" Comiskey, 1859

E. Nesbit, 1858

Sir Walter Scott, 1771

Napoleon Bonaparte, 1769

Debuting/Premiering Today:

Mainz Psalter(Publication date; first book with the publication date printed on the colophon), 1457

Today in History:

Battle of Roncevaux Pass, the Basques defeat Charles the Great (Charlemagne) and Roland is killed, 778

Macbeth defeats his cousin and rival King Duncan I, who is killed in the battle, and becomes king of Scotland, 1040

Battle of Lumphanan, in which King Macbeth is killed by the forces of Mael Coluim MacDonnchada, 1057

The cave city of Vardzia is consecrated by Queen Tamar of Georgia, 1185

The foundation stone of Cologne Cathedral, built to house the relics of 

the Three Wise Men, is laid, 1248*

The "Mainz Psalter" is completed, the earliest dated book, 1457

Founding of Panama City, 1519

Jesuit priest St. Francis Xaverius land in Kagoshima, Japan, 1549

Joseph Haydn departs England, never to return, 1795

Country of Liberia is founded by freed American former slaves, 1824

Tivoli Gardens, one of the oldest still intact amusement parks in the world, opens in Copenhagen, Denmark, 1842

The Cathedral of Our Lady of Peace in Honolulu, Hawai'i, is dedicated; it is the oldest continuously used Roman Catholic Cathedral in the US, 1843

San Sebastian Church in Manila, the first all-steel church in Asia, is officially inaugurated and blessed, 1891

A male servant of American architect Frank Lloyd Wright sets fire to the living quarters of the architect's Wisconsin home, 1914

The Panama Canal opens to traffic with the transit of the cargo ship Ancon, 1914

Will Rogers and Wiley Post are killed in a plane crash, 1935

The birth of stadium rock:  The Beatles play Shae Stadium, 1965

President Richard Nixon completes the break from the gold standard, 1971

The "Wow! signal":  The Big Ear, a radio telescope operated by Ohio State University as part of the SETI project, receives a radio signal from deep space, 1977

An 8.0-magnitude earthquake off the Pacific coast devastates Ica and various regions of Peru killing 514 and injuring 1,090, 2007

The olinguito becomes the first mammal to be discovered in the past 35 years, 2013

*Yes, we just noted the other day the date of completion in 1880!