Saturday, August 23, 2014

Piercing Dialog

"Sanctuary!" Young Jacob yelled, running into the kitchen where i was washing dishes.

What? i asked him.

"Sanctuary!  I'm claiming sanctuary!" he exclaimed.

Sanctuary from what? i again inquired.

"From the piercer!  My posterior is in danger!" he said, and just then Little Girl ran into the kitchen with her pocket knife, the cheap kind that probably wouldn't cut hot butter, in her hand.

"The Piercer or Posteriors!" she said, eyeing Young Jacob as if he had a bull's eye on him somewhere.

"That's why I need sanctuary, she wants to pierce my posterior!" Young Jacob said, grinning at her.

Why are you trying to pierce him? i asked her.

"Because he needs a visit from the Piercer of Posteriors!" she said, pretending to lunge at him.

May i suggest you be careful?  Especially since he could pick you up and carry you off, i said.

"Okay, for this time," she said, putting the little knife away.  "But the Piercer of Posteriors will return someday, so be aware!"

Young Jacob looked at me.  "I may be back for sanctuary again," he noted, then headed back out to the living room.


Today is

Bartletide -- West Witton, Yorkshire Dales, UK (a/k/a Burning Bartle, a ceremony in which a straw effigy of Owd Bartle, a sheep theif of yore, is paraded, then burned after sunset, as a warning to the light fingered; always on the Saturday nearest St. Bartholemew's Day, which is August 24)

Black Ribbon Day -- Estonia; Latvia; Lithuania

Country Fair and Auction -- McHenry, MD, US (sponsored by the local Mennonite churches, a good old-fashioned time of family fun)

De Ducasse -- Ath, Belgium (Giants of Ath Festival or Wedding of the Giants, a celebration since medieval times in which "Goliath" marries, then goes to do battle with David; through tomorrow)

European Day of Remembrance for Victims of Stalinism and Nazism -- European Union

Ferret Buckeye Bash -- Colombus, OH, US (ferret show)

Flag Day -- Ukraine

Great Feast of the Netjeru (all gods and goddesses) -- Ancient Egyptian Calendar (date approximate)

Health Unit Coordinator Day -- US ( National Association of Health Unit Coordinators, Inc.)


Hotter 'n H*ll Hundred Bike Race -- Wichita Falls, TX, US (cyclists of all ages in the largest sanctioned century ride in the US, in the Texas summer heat)

International Day for the Remembrance of the Slave Trade and Its Abolition

Koenji Awa Odori Festival -- Suginami City, Tokyo, Japan (thousands dance in the streets, through tomorrow)

National Spongecake Day

Nemeseia -- Ancient Greek Calendar (local festival to the goddess Nemesis, date approximate)

Pittsburgh Renaissance Festival -- Pittsburgh, PA, US (relive the days of yore, watch artisans practice the olde crafts, and have a high good time; weekends through September)

Ride the Wind Day -- internet generated, a day to get out and ride with the wind in your hair, in whatever transport you choose, or fly a kite

Schemitzun(Green Corn Pow Wow) -- Mashantucket Pequot Tribal Nation (through tomorrow, Pow Wow and presentations of Native heritage to all)

Sento Kuyo -- Nenbutsu-Ji Temple, Adashino, Kyoto, Japan (memorial service for graves that no longer have families to tend them; through tomorrow)

Sidewalk Art Festival -- Portland, ME, US

St. Eoghan's Day (Patron of Derry, Ireland)

St. Rose of Lima's Day (Patron of embroiderers, florists, gardeners, needle workers, people ridiculed for piety; The Americas/The New World, especially Central and South America, Latin America, Peru, and the West Indies; Lima, Peru; Philippines, Santa Rosa, CA, US; Villareal Samar, Philippines; against vanity)

Valentino Memorial Service -- Hollywood Cathedral Museum, Hollywood Forever Cemetary, Los Angeles, CA, US (annually since 1927, a memorial service celebrating Rudolph Valentino on the anniversary of his death)

Vertumnalia -- Ancient Roman Calendar (in honor of Vertumnus and Pomona)

Vuelta a Espana -- Spain (the third of cycling's prestigious Grand Tours; through Sept. 14)

Vulcanalia -- Ancient Roman Calendar (festival to the god of fire)


Birthdays Today:

Kobe Bryant, 1978
Jay Mohr, 1970
River Phoenix, 1970
Queen Noor of Jordan, 1951
Rick Springfield, 1949
Shelley Long, 1949
Antonia Novello, 1944
Patricia McBride, 1942
Richard Sanders, 1940
Tony Bill, 1940
Barbara Eden, 1934
Sonny Jurgensen, 1934
Mark Russel, 1932
Vera Miles, 1930
Gene Kelly, 1912
Edgar Lee Masters, 1868
Navy Commodore Oliver Hazard Perry, 1785
Louis XVI, 1754


Debuting/Premiering Today:

"She Loves You"(Beatles single release date), 1963
"The Bat"(Mystery play), 1930
"Gasoline Alley"(as a daily comic strip), 1919


Today in History:

On the feast of Vulcan, Roman god of fire, Mt. Vesuvius begins to rumble, 79
Visigoths storm Rome, 410
Edward I executes William Wallace, Scottish patriot, for high treason, 1305
French explorer Jacques Cartier lands near Quebec City in his third voyage to Canada, 1541
Rabbi Joseph Caro completes his commentary of Tur Code, 1542
The St. Bartholomew's Day massacre of Huguenots in Paris begins, 1572
The first one-way streets open in London, 1617
Steamship service begins on the Great Lakes, 1818
Great Britain abolishes slavery in the colonies, 700,000 slaves are freed, 1833
Automobile tire chain is patented, 1904
The World Council of Churches is formed, 1948
Lunar Orbiter I takes the first picture of Earth from the Moon's orbit, 1966
Bryan Allan, in a Gossamer Condor, completes the first man-powered flight of one mile, 1977
Soviet dancer Alexander Godunov defects to the US, 1979
Hans Tiedge, top counter-spy of West Germany, defects to East Germany, 1985
Hungary opens the Iron Curtain and allows thousands of East Germans through to West Germany, 1989
West Germany and East Germany announce that they will unite on Oct. 3, 1990
The remains of Anastasia and Alexei, rumored to have survived the 1917 assassination of the Russian Czar and his family, are found, 2007
Heavy winds knock down the Anne Frank tree in Amsterdam, breaking off approximately one meter above the ground, 2010
Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi is overthrown, 2011
Lance Armstrong, the seven-time Tour de France winner, announces he will not contest the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency charges of doping, a result of which will include being stripped of all of his tour de France victories, 2012
Libya's ruins of Cyrene, a World Heritage Site near Shahhat, is damaged by real estate developers, 2013

4 comments:

  1. Bwahahahahahahahaha. Some things just need doing mom. Too fun.

    Have a fabulous weekend. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ah, idiots! I love the way kids fool around!

    ReplyDelete
  3. We're all doomed when kids run out of imagination.

    ReplyDelete