"Oh, Mom, could Miss Lizzie come live here?" Bigger Girl had just come in from her Sunday evening Church work.
Miss Lizzie from the church where you work Sunday evenings? The one who had a baby she allowed to be adopted a few months ago?
"Yes. She is living with a new boyfriend, but he beats her up so he's in jail right now. And he spent the money for the electric bill on crack, so the electricity is going to be turned off tomorrow and she wants to leave because she doesn't know when he will get out of jail and she wants to be gone when he does."
Is she beginning to understand some of the consequences of the choices she is making with her life?
"Yes, and she has a job and a car, but no cell phone because hers got stolen, and I gave her our phone number and can she come live here? I'll let her stay in my room."
If she agrees to a few house rules, and continues to try to work and make her life better, yes.
"Oh, thank you, Mom. By the way, she also has a puppy."
"You promised! And besides, the foster kittens should get used to a dog, it makes them more adoptable!"
"Well, she might not call, she had a couple of other people at church offering, too."
For the record, she didn't call, but if she does, watch out cats, you will meet your match.
A joke for Joe Miller's Joke Day, #99 from the book published in his name after his death in 1738:
A Lady's Age happening to be questioned, she affirmed she was but Forty, and called upon a Gentleman that was in Company for his Opinion; Cousin, said she, do you believe I am in the Right, when I say I am but Forty? I ought not to dispute it, Madam, reply'd he, for I have heard you say so these ten Years.
Baba Au Rhum Day -- of course, on rum day, bake some bread with the stuff!
Children's Day -- Paraguay
Daimonji Bonfire -- Mt. Nyoigadake, Kyoto, Japan (spectacular bonfires in the shapes of word pictures on the mountains surrounding the city)
Elvis Presley Day
Festival of the Minstrels -- Tutbury Castle, UK (middle ages)
Gozan no Okuribi -- Kyoto, Japan (a/k/a Daimonji, culmination of the O-Bon Festival)
Harmonic Convergence Day -- modern followers of Maya and Aztec calendars
Independence Day -- Cyprus
Joe Miller's Joke Day
Madonna del Voto Day -- Siena, Italy (a/k/a Palio dell'Assunta, 2nd of the traditional yearly horse races)
National Airborne Day -- US (honors all Airborne Military)
National Tell a Joke Day -- seems internet generated, probably because of Joe Miller
National Rum Day
Restoration of the Republic -- Dominican Republic
Roller Coaster Day
St. Roch's Day (patron of those with plague)
St. Stephen of Hungary Day (Patron Saint of Hungary)
World's Fair of Money -- Chicago, IL, US (numismatist convention, the greaest money show on earth)
Xicolatada -- Palau-de-Cerdagne, France (hot chocolate festival)*
Youth Day -- Spain
Timothy Hutton, 1960
Angela Bassett, 1958
James Cameron, 1954
Kathie Lee Gifford, 1953
Leslie Ann Warren, 1946
Eydie Gorme, 1932
Frank Gifford, 1930
Ann Blyth, 1928
Fess Parker, 1925
Menachem Begin, 1913
George Meany, 1894
T. E. Lawrence (of Arabia), 1888
Hongxi Emperor of China, 1378
Today in History:
Henry VIII defeats the French at the Battle of Guinegate/Battle of the Spurs, forcing the French to retreat, 1513
Jack Broughton formulates the earliest code of rules for boxing, 1743
Chang and Eng Bunker, the original "Siamese" twins, arrive in Boston to be exhibited, 1829
U.S. President James Buchanan inaugurates the new transatlantic telegraph cable by exchanging greetings with Queen Victoria of the United Kingdom, 1858
Arica, Peru (now Chile) is devastated by a tsunami which followed a magnitude 8.5 earthquake, 1868
Gold is discovered in the Klondike, at Bonanza Creek, 1896
Edwin Prescott patents the roller coaster, 1898
In Valparaiso, Chile, an 8.6 earthquake followed by fire destroys the city and kills 20,000, 1906
The first color sound cartoon, called Fiddlesticks, is made by Ub Iwerks, 1930
Democrats nominate Adlai E. Stevenson as presidential candidate, 1956
Joseph Kittinger parachutes from a balloon over New Mexico at 102,800 feet (31,300 m), setting three records that still stand today: High-altitude jump, free-fall, and highest speed by a human without an aircraft, 1960
A solar flare from the Sun creates a geomagnetic storm that affects micro chips, leading to a halt of all trading on Toronto's stock market, 1989
*Yes, they celebrate a hot chocolate festival in the summer. It all started when the 15th of August was a feast day on which the locals always drank a bit much, and the chocolatier of the town claimed his brew was a good remedy the day after. The original festival on the 15th has ceased, but the hot chocolate is brewed to this day, served at 11am promptly
3 hours ago