Showing posts with label funnies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funnies. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 2, 2026

Where the Cards Live, a Random and Happy Tuesday Post

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It's time once again for a random and happy Tuesday, linking up with Stacy's Random Thoughts at Stacy Uncorked and Sandee at Comedy Plus.  



Detail cleaning at Carl's goes on, and i am tackling clothes.  There's a good bit of stuff which probably just needs to be thrown out as he has used it to death, but Ms. V and i need to talk about it.


Meanwhile, last Wednesday Ms. G decided since she was sick I needed to go to the store for her.  After all, a sinus infection does mean you need extra ice cream in the house, especially if it is on sale at the local grocer.


As i was preparing to leave, she stopped me and said, "Here, let me send you this text."


I almost burst out laughing.  After all, isn't the point of her texting me the list, at least in part, that i do not have to be there to get the list?


But i stopped and she not only texted, she made sure to read it to me to "clarify" i was to call her and let her know what flavors of chocolate were available (sometimes they are out of one or another).


Oh, and if the Sprite Zero is on sale, get it, too.  After all, it has no calories.


Of course, it was on sale, and when i called to talk to her, they only had one flavor of chocolate and no "Strawberries and Cream" flavor she had listed.  Just Strawberries and Vanilla.  That would do, and instead of chocolate, Pralines and Cream.  Plus the three vanillas.  Half Gallon size, naturally, and six 12-packs of Sprite Zero.


When i arrived back at her house, as soon as i'd put down the ice cream she loaded it into the chest freezer in her own very special way.  By that time, i'd brought in the other items and she was back in her chair, so i gave her the receipt and her debit card.


"Oh, yes, let me put that back where it lives," she said, stuffing it under her shirt.  "This is where the cards live, you know, at least once I get dressed in the morning."


See, Carl isn't the only client who can keep me entertained.


How about some funnies.




















Have a blessed and beautiful Tuesday, everyone!






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Today is:


Coronation Day and Social Forestry Day -- Bhutan (anniversary of  the coronation day of the Jigme Singye Wangchuck, the 4th Druk Gyalpo, in 1974, and the day children plant trees)


Festa della Republica -- Italy (National Day/Feast of the Republic)


Festival of Utter Confusion -- an internet declared holiday, and this is the one for me!


Hristo Botev Day -- Bulgaria (poet and national hero who fell fighting the Turks this day in 1876)


"I Love My Dentist" Day -- no one will claim starting this one, so it makes me suspicious


Isabel Province Day -- Isabel Province, Solomon Islands


National Bubba Day -- created by comedian T. Bubba Bechtol for Bubbas everywhere to have their day


National Leave the Office Earlier Day -- sponsored by Laura Stack, The Productivity Pro, who urges people to maximize productivity so they can leave the office earlier every day 

National Rocky Road Day


St. Blandina's Day (Patron of girls, people falsely accused, torture victims; Lyon, France)


St. Elmo's Day (a/k/a St. Erasmus; Patron of ammunition workers, boatmen, childbirth and women in labor, explosives workers, mariners, navigators, ordnance workers, sailors, watermen; Gaeta, Italy; against abdominal pains, appendicitis, birth pains, childhood intestinal disease, colic, danger at sea, intestinal disorders, seasickness, stomach diseases, storms)


Yell "Fudge" at the Cobras in North America Day -- at noon, your local time, because according to Wellcat Holidays, cobras hate fudge and will not stay if we mention it



Anniversaries Today:


U.S. President Grover Cleveland marries Frances Folsom, 1886 (only president to wed in the executive mansion)

Elizabeth II is crowned Queen of the United Kingdom, Canada, Australia, New Zealand and Her Other Realms and Territories & Head of the Commonwealth, 1953 (the first major international event to be televised)



Birthdays Today:


Justin Long, 1978

Zachary Quinto, 1977

Queen 'Masenate Mohato Seeiso, Queen consort of Lesotho, 1976

Wayne Brady, 1972

Wentworth Miller, 1972

Joel Tobeck, 1971

Dana Carvey, 1955

Gary Grimes, 1955

Dennis Haysbert, 1954

Diana Canova, 1953

Cornel West, 1953

Jerry Mathers, 1948

Marvin Hamlisch, 1944

Charles Haid, 1943

Stacy Keach, Jr., 1941

Charlie Watts, 1941

Sally Kellerman, 1937

Milo O’Shea, 1926

Johnny Weissmuller, 1904

Hedda Hopper, 1890

Sir Edward Elgar, 1857

Thomas Hardy, 1840

Marquis de Sade, 1740

Martha Dandridge Custiss Washington, 1731



Today in History:


The Vandals enter Rome and begin 2 weeks of plundering, 455

The First Siege of Antioch ends when Crusader forces take the city, 1098

The first Récollet missionaries arrive at Quebec City, from Rouen, France, 1615

Bridget Bishop is the first person to go to trial in the Salem witch trials in Salem, Massachusetts, 1692

The Derby horserace is held for the first time in Epsom, England, 1780

P. T. Barnum and his circus start their first tour of the United States, 1835

The Slavic congress in Prague begins, 1848

Guglielmo Marconi applies for a patent for his early radio device, 1896

U.S. President Calvin Coolidge signs the Indian Citizenship Act, making Native American Indians withing US territories and states US citizens, 1924

Lou Gehrig begins his streak of 2,130 consecutive games played, 1925

In a referendum, Italians vote to turn Italy from a monarchy into a Republic, and exile their king, Umberto II di Savoia, 1946

The USSR and Yugoslavia sign the Belgrade declaration and thus normalize relations, 1955

Surveyor 1 lands in Oceanus Procellarum on the Moon, becoming the first U.S. spacecraft to soft land on another world, 1966

Pope John Paul II visits his native Poland, becoming the first Pope to visit a Communist country, 1979

The Bhutan Broadcasting Service brings television transmissions to the Kingdom for the first time, 1999

Europe launches its first probe to voyage to another planet, Mars, 2003

The World Health Organization announces the E. coli strain responsible for the 2011 E.coli O104:H4 outbreak had never before been isolated from patients, 2011

The US Congress passes new legislation to reform National Security Agency procedures, restricting gathering of phone records, 2015

One hundred volunteers in Bhutan set a world record for tree planting, setting out 49,672 in 1 hour, 2015

Queen Elizabeth II marks her Platinum Jubilee with a military parade as the start of four days of celebrations, 2022

The Chinese spacecraft Chang'e-6 successfully lands on the far side of the Moon to collect and analyze rock samples, 2024

Mexico elects former Mayor of Mexico City, Claudia Sheinbaum, as its first woman president, 2024

Tuesday, May 26, 2026

Doggone Autocorrect! A Random and Happy Tuesday Post

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It's time once again for a random and happy Tuesday, linking up with Stacy's Random Thoughts at Stacy Uncorked and Sandee at Comedy Plus.  



Progress continues to be made in Carl's former digs, which will be where he stays when he visits and will be a good guest bedroom.


The soap scum in the shower is succumbing to treatment, i'm  hoping only one or two more sessions will actually clear it away.


Yesterday i made the bed (so Mr. L can go in there and sleep when i'm cleaning the rest of the house every other Thursday), finished cleaning out the rest of the bathroom, threw away a lot of junk from the kitchen and got half of it deep cleaned, sorted through a lot of stuff and most important to Ms. V, cleaned out his car.


Carl, like so many, lived in his car when he was in it.  There are now at least 3 loads of laundry waiting for me from stuff in the car, much other stuff is in the trash, and all the vehicle needs is vacuuming, a run through the car wash, and lots of fabric cleaner.


Speaking of cars, Ms. G always has to clean the passenger seat of the car before she can put me in it, and she conducts business as much as possible on the phone while driving.  If she's not on the phone (speakerphone), she's dictating a text message.


Of course, if you dictate a text, you have to deal with both the program's misunderstandings of what you said, and the dreaded autocorrect.


Last week, as she tried to send a message, she stopped at a light to read it before sending (always a wise idea) and yelled, "I said 'pm' not 'bm'!  Doggone phone!"


(For any who might not know, a "bm" can stand for "bowel movement."  She certainly wasn't trying to send any messages about that topic.)


We both ended up laughing over the phone's misunderstanding what she said and i suggested leaving on spell check but turning off autocorrect, which is what i do.  She's thinking about it.


How about some funnies.


















Have a blessed and beautiful Tuesday, everyone!






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Today is:


Bob Day -- an internet holiday i couldn't confirm, but if your name is Bob, you deserve a special day just for having that name!


Dracula Day -- Bram Stoker's Dracula went on sale this day in 1897


Dzien Matki -- Poland (Mother's Day)


Eid al-Adha -- Islam (Festival of Sacrifice, a three-day commemoration of Abraham's obedience and willingness to sacrifice his son; begins at sunset, local customs of date and official government days off in many places will vary)


Festival of the Valley -- Ancient Egyptian Calendar (celebration of the movement of Amun from the East Bank of Thebes to the West Bank; it involved giving flowers and sharing food with the dead)


Holiday of the Receiving of Ra -- Ancient Egyptian Calendar (date approximate)


Independence Day -- Georgia(1918); Guyana(1966)


National Blueberry Cheesecake Day


National Cherry Dessert Day


National Day of Healing -- Australia (formerly called National Sorry Day; to express regret for the ill treatment of Aboriginal Peoples of Australia)


National Paper Airplane Day -- not an official holiday, but go make one, and have a blast; some people even organize contests


Prince Jonah Kuhio Kalanianaole Day -- Hawai'i


Sally Ride Day -- US (birth anniversary of America's first woman in space)


St. Augustine of Canterbury's Day (First Archbishop of Canterbury and Patron of England; feast day in the Anglican Communion and most Eastern Churches)


St. Philip Neri's Day (Patron of Gravina, Manfredonia-Vieste-San Giovanni Rotondo, and Rome, Italy; the United States Army Special Forces)


Thargelia -- Ancient Greek Calendar (birthday festival of Apollo and Artemis; through tomorrow, date approximate)


World Lindy Hop Day -- Frankie Manning's birth anniversary    




Anniversaries Today:


Boston University is founded by the Massachusetts legislature, 1869



Birthdays Today:


King Frederik of Denmark, 1968

Helena Bonham Carter, 1966

Lenny Kravitz, 1964

Genie Francis, 1962

Sally Ride, 1951

Pam Grier, 1949

Philip Michael Thomas, 1949

Hank Williams, Jr., 1949

Stevie Nicks, 1948

Brent Musburger, 1939

Miles Davis, 1926

James Arness, 1923

Peggy Lee, 1920

Jay Silverheels, 1919

Frankie Manning, 1914

Peter Cushing, 1913

Robert Morley, 1908

John Wayne, 1907

Dorothea Lange, 1895

Al Jolson, 1886



Today in History:


Armenian rebels battle the Sassanid empire and win the right to openly practice Christianity, 451

An earthquake strikes Kamakura, Japan, killing about 30,000, 1293

Geneva expels John Calvin and his followers from the city, 1538

Alse Young becomes the first person executed as a witch in the American colonies, 1647

Lewis and Clark first see the Rocky Mountains, 1805

The Indian Removal Act is passed by the U.S. Congress, 1830

Dred Scott is emancipated by the Blow family, his original owners, 1857

The impeachment trial of U.S. President Andrew Johnson ends with Johnson being found not guilty by one vote, 1868

Nicholas II becomes Tsar of Russia, 1894

Charles Dow publishes the first edition of the Dow Jones Industrial Average, 1896

The first major commercial oil strike in the Middle East is made, 1908

The world's longest-lasting tornado, lasting for over 7 hours and traveling 293 miles, strikes Mattoon, Illinois, 1917

British Guiana gains independence, becoming Guyana, 1966

Apollo 10 returns to Earth after a successful eight-day test of all the components needed for the forthcoming first manned moon landing, 1969

The Soviet Tupolev Tu-144 becomes the first commercial transport to exceed Mach 2, 1970

Willandra National Park is established in Australia, 1972

George Willig climbs the South Tower of New York City's World Trade Center, 1977

A 7.7 magnitude earthquake strikes Japan, triggering a tsunami that kills at least 104 people, injures thousands. Many people go missing and thousands of buildings are destroyed, 1983

The European Community adopts the European flag, 1986

Zviad Gamsakhurdia becomes the first democratically elected President of the Republic of Georgia in the post-Soviet era, 1991

The Supreme Court of the United States rules that Ellis Island, the historic gateway for millions of immigrants, is mainly in the state of New Jersey, not New York, 1998

Sherpa Lakpa Gelu climbs Mount Everest in 10 hours 56 minutes, 2003

The New York Times publishes an admission of journalistic failings, claiming that its flawed reporting and lack of skepticism towards sources during the build-up to the 2003 war in Iraq helped promote the belief that Iraq possessed large stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction, 2004

The May 2006 Java earthquake kills over 6,600 people, leaves 200,000 homeless, 2006*

The World Health Organization confirms that Ebola has reached Sierra Leone, 2014

Hackers steal personal data for about 100,000 taxpayers after breaking into a U.S. Internal Revenue Service system that allows taxpayers to retrieve previous tax returns; the data can be used to file tax refund claims and commit identity theft, 2015

Ken Wyatt becomes Australia's first Aboriginal minister in government as the minister for indigenous Australians, 2019

Amazon says it will buy 97-year-old film and television studio Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer for $8.45 billion, 2021

A Hindi novel wins the International Booker Prize for the first time, Tomb of Sand by Geetanjali Shree, 2022

King Charles III begins a royal visit to Canada, 2025


*Occurred 22:54 GMT May 26, 05:54 Local Time May 27, so some sources date it today, some tomorrow