Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Still Shaking My Head

While i'm going to stop asking myself why i read these articles, because apparently i'm not going to cease from reading them, i am going to start getting a little bit of fun out of them.

What i'm talking about are the "what to serve for dinner every night this week" articles.  Every time i'm stuck for what to cook, and i see one and click on it and read it, all i get is frustrated, because their suggestions are, at the end of the day, hilarious for a person who is trying to feed a husband who is a former farm boy with appetite and taste to match, a #2 Son who wants to be a chef but is, himself, a picky eater, and two vegetarian daughters.

They are also hysterical to a person on a seriously tight budget.

From now on, when i read them, i'm going to get a bit of fun out of it by imagining what my Sweetie would say if i ever actually served these things.  (Please note that he is also a former chef, and might enjoy some of these in a restaurant setting, but when he is at home, he wants something he's used to, or like his mother used to make.  She was a country cook with bacon grease ever at her elbow for a reason.)

This week's selection, from a Yahoo article:

Monday:  French Onion Soup   Sweetie's probable response:  "Eww!  What kind of cheese did you use in this!  And you didn't pick a better wine to go with it?  Where are the sandwiches?  You know I don't like a soup night without sandwiches, soup is just a liquid.  It doesn't fill me up!"

Tuesday:  Pasta Shells with Chicken and Brussels Sprouts   Sweetie's probable response:  "Pasta!  You know I don't eat much pasta any more, it's too fattening.  And why would you use Brussels sprouts?  You know I hate those!"  (Note:  he will then go to an Italian restaurant and proceed to suck down plain old spaghetti and meatballs like there is no tomorrow.)

Wednesday:  Roast Cod with Little Tomatoes and Assorted Olives   Sweetie's probably response:  "You know how much I hate fish!  My mom never served fish!"

Thursday:  Easy, Lighter Baked Falafel   Sweetie's probable response:  "How come there's no meat with this meal?  And you know I don't like most Mediterranean food, except hummus.  It all tastes so weird to me.  They put cinnamon in the meat.  And pine nuts.  I hate pine nuts.  How do you pronounce this?  I don't think I like it."

Friday:  Gouda, Pear and Arugula Grilled Cheese   Sweetie's probable response:  "What kind of grilled cheese sandwich is this?  I only like grilled cheddar cheese sandwiches.  Why did you put this green stuff on it?"

Saturday:  Butternut Squash Baked Risotto   Sweetie's probable response:  "How come there's no meat with this?  And I hate squash, unless it's cooked down in bacon grease."

Saturday:  Roast Chicken Dinner   Sweetie's probable response:  "Finally!"

Yes, i'm exaggerating a little, just for a laugh.  It's true, though, he wouldn't like most of this menu, and we probably wouldn't be able to afford it anyway.

The real kitchen magicians, i've noted for a long time, are not the celebrity chefs who have all the ingredients they want at their fingertips, with someone else to expedite them (a fancy chef word for having another person to do all the chopping and prep work).  It's the mom on a limited budget who is trying to come up with yet another way to serve that same old pound of ground beef.


Today is:

Cayenne Festival -- French Guiana (celebration of the capital city)

Cementation and Propitiation Festival / Friends Made Ceremony -- Cherokee Native Americans (approximately 10 days after the Great New Moon that marked the New Year, a festival for renewing friendships, making new friends, cleansing, and building a new Sacred Fire; dating approximate as often these ceremonies are closed to the public)

Day of Hommage for the late King Father -- Cambodia (Norodom Sihanouk)

Dine with TV Dinners on the Floor Night -- probably started by someone who wanted to see how many websites would be crazy enough to even list this

Feast of the Three Noble Ladies -- Ancient Egyptian Calendar (female pharoahs; date approximate)

Fete Nationale de l'Evacuation -- Tunisia (Evacuation Day, celebrates the day all foreign military finally and fully left)

Global Handwashing Day -- International (scrub up! prevent the spread of germs)

Guangzhou Autumn Trade Fair -- Guangzhou, China (through Nov. 15)

Ides of October -- Ancient Roman Calendar; also on this date
     Harvest Festival of Mars
     Ludi Capitolini (games in honor of Jupiter)
     Winter's Day

International Day of Rural Women -- UN

Mahakiki -- Hawai'ian New Year Season (a four month season where warfare is forbidden and many ceremonies take place; begins around the time of the first sighting of the Pleiades in the Northern Hemisphere)

Mertz of All Possible Mertzes -- internet generated and on the day "I Love Lucy" premiered; i guess Fred and Ethel were the definition of what a Mertz should be!

National Cake Decorating Day -- again, because every website gives a different date

National Chicken Cacciatore Day

National Grouch Day -- sponsored by Alan Miller, chairman of the board of NAG (National Association of Grouches)

National Mushroom Day

National Roast Pheasant Day

National Tree Planting Day -- Sri Lanka

Newspaper Week -- Japan

Poetry Day -- birth anniversary of the Roman poet Virgil

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day -- Canada; NSW, Australia; UK; US

Rectification Day -- Burkina Faso

Rainbow Pickling Day -- Fairy Calendar

Sewing Lovers' Day -- internet generated, as those who love to sew deserve a day to celebrate

St. Teresa of Avila's Day (Founder of the Reformation of the Discalces[Barefoot] Carmelites; Patron of lace makers/workers, people in need of grace, people in religious orders, people ridiculed for their piety, sick people; Amos, Canada; Berzano di Tortona, Italy; Pozega, Croatia; Spain; against bodily ills, headaches, sickness, the death of parents)

Teacher's Day -- Brazil

The NILE (Northern International Livestock Exposition) -- MetraPark, Billings, MT, US (rodeo, trade show, horse clinics, and livestock sales; through Saturday)

White Cane Safety Day -- US (celebrating the achievements of the blind/visually impared, and recognizing the white cane as the symbol of their independence)

Wishbones for Pets begins -- US program asking professional pet sitters to gather pet supplies and donations for homeless pets through Thanksgiving

World Rural Women's Day/International Day of Rural Women -- UN; related observance
     Mother's Day -- Malawi


Birthdays Today:

Sarah Ferguson, 1959
Emeril Lagasse,1959
Tanya Roberts, 1955
Richard Carpenter, 1946
Jim Palmer, 1945
Penny Marshall, 1942
Linda Lavin, 1937
Lee Iacocca, 1924
Mario Puzo, 1920
Arthur Schlesinger, Jr., 1917
John Kenneth Galbraith, 1908
Friedrich Nietzsche, 1844
Publius Vergilius Maro / Virgil, 70BCE


Debuting/Premiering Today:

I Love Lucy, 1951


Today in History:

Belisarius makes his formal entry into Carthage, having conquered it from the Vandals, 533
Commissioned by Catherine De Medici, the 1st ballet "Ballet Comique de la Reine," is staged in Paris, 1581
Asser Levy is granted a butcher's license for kosher meat in New Amsterdam, 1660
The Montgolfier brothers' hot air balloon marks the first human ascent, by Jean-François Pilâtre de Rozier, (tethered balloon), 1783
George Washington takes the first formal presidential tour, of New England, 1789
Napoleon Bonaparte is exiled to the Island of St. Helena, 1815
Child labor law takes 12 year olds out of the work force, 1874
Edison Electric Light Company is incorporated, 1878
Koln cathedral is completed, 633 years after it was begun, 1880
The German dirigible "Graf Zeppelin' lands in Lakehurst, NJ, 1928
LaGuardia Airport opens, 1939
Fortran, the first modern computer language, is shared with the coding community for the first time, 1946
The start of the 2500-year celebration of Iran, celebrating the birth of Persia, 1971
The Great Storm of 1987 hits France and England, 1987
Wayne Gretzky becomes the all-time leading points scorer in the NHL, 1989
Soviet Union leader Mikhail Gorbachev is awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, 1990
The first supersonic land speed record is set by Andy Green in ThrustSSC (United Kingdom), exactly 50 years and 1 day after Chuck Yeager first broke the sound barrier in the Earth's atmosphere, 1997
The Cassini probe launches from Cape Canaveral on its way to Saturn, 1997
NASA's Galileo spacecraft passes within 112 miles of Jupiter's moon Io, 2001
China launches Shenzhou 5, its first manned space mission, 2003

4 comments:

  1. With people starving in the world I have little patience for picky eaters...one of my prejudices, I know. I myself will eat what is put in front of me, and if I do not like it, I will not eat all of it.

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  2. Bless your husbands heart. He's a meat and potatoes kind of guy.

    Have a fabulous day. :)

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  3. Lol! This IS a very funny post. My husband is this same way, and as a matter of fact, so am i. I am a meatloaf and mashed potatoes girl all the way! For most of the ingredients you list here, i'd have to go to a very expensive organic market. (I DO go to a market like that once in awhile, but just to splurge on a kind of dark chocolate i like.). Lol

    And the magazine articles that always get me are the ones that say, (or scream) 'Drop 10 pounds in 2 weeks!' Or, 'Lose your belly fat in 10 days!'. And i just laugh and get annoyed at the same time!

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  4. What? Are you admitting to the world that you don't cook with truffles? Say it ain't so!

    ReplyDelete