Saturday, December 5, 2015

Our Own Paper Chase

Little Girl has had a sudden welcome into the world of military paperwork.  In triplicate.

Two days before her 12th birthday, #2 Son built a bike ramp and enticed his sister to go over it.  She did, and broke her arm.

We took her to the ED at St. SoAndSo Hospital, where they put it in a sling, gave us a pain prescription, and told us to go to Dr. Frye, a pediatric orthopedic doctor associated with the hospital, as soon as we could.

Dr. Frye ended up having to do surgery and put pins in her arm, and she had physical therapy.  In the end, her arm was back to completely normal, and she has no hitch in it at all.

Try telling that to the Army National Guard.

They told her that she had to have her medical records to prove that all is well.  This should be easy, right?  Dr. Frye is still practicing in the same office right next to St. SoAndSo Hospital.

She went to get her records, and that's when the fun began.  The hospital could find the original chart of her visit to the ED, but said she would have to go to Dr. Frye's office over at The Bone Doctor Clinic to get the rest of her records.

Except that The Bone Doctor Clinic didn't have any record of her being a patient there.

For two weeks, The Bone Doctor Clinic and St. SoAndSo Hospital sent her back and forth, as we tried everything to work our way around it.  She was even X-rayed again and seen by Dr. Frye, who wrote her up a new paper saying all was well, she has no restrictions in activity.

That, for the Army National Guard, is not good enough, unless you can also provide a letter saying that the clinic, or the hospital, can't find the original records.

The Bone Doctor Clinic says she was never a patient there before, so they can't give you such a letter.  St. SoAndSo Hospital doesn't give out such a letter unless you sue them for it.

Then one day last week i went to the Bone Doctor Clinic to see if i could get to the bottom of why this was all happening.  By G-d's grace, the office manager had come back in town and gotten a handle on the situation.

It seems that St. SoAndSo Hospital owns the building in which The Bone Doctor Clinic is housed.  At the time Little Girl was Dr. Frye's patient, he wasn't working for The Bone Doctor Clinic, but was an employee of St. SoAndSo Hospital Pediatric Group At The Bone Doctor Clinic.  St. SoAndSo Hospital was subleasing part of its own building back from The Bone Doctor Clinic.

Eventually, St. SoAndSo Hospital decided to end having its own group in that way, and so Dr. Frye went back to working for simply The Bone Doctor Clinic, where he had been before.

So her records belonged to a clinic that no longer existed, and the records had been returned to St. SoAndSo Hospital, which has outsourced all of its record keeping.  The group to which it had been outsourced, RecordPort, had sub-outsourced the specific records from that clinic to DataTrappers.

The lady at DataTrappers finally found the chart, and said she would only send it to the now non-existent St. SoAndSo Hospital Pediatric Group At The Bone Doctor Clinic.  The office manager at The Bone Doctor Clinic called and yelled at a few people at St. SoAndSo Hospital, and those people got the lady who wouldn't believe the group no longer existed to send the chart to RecordPort's office at St. SoAndSo Hospital, where we were finally able to get it.

All is finally well, and Little Girl is still excited about joining the Army National Guard.  She now realizes, i think, that she has only just begun to fight the paper tiger that can be the military.

Today is:

AFL-CIO Day (date of merger in 1955)

Bartender Appreciation Day -- with a guide to help you show your appreciation to the Heroes Behind the Bar 

Bathtub Party Day -- celebrate how much fun it is to take a nice, long, hot bath in these days when showers prevail; sponsored by Wellcat Holidays

Boycott Day -- commemoration of the city bus boycott begun this day in 1959 in Birmingham, AL, US in response to the arrest of Rosa Parks

Caldwell Country Christmas Parade & Fireworks -- Colombia, LA, US

Cape May Christmas Candlelight House Tours -- Cape May, NJ, US (tours of homes, b&bs, guesthouses, hotels, and churches for 3 consecutive Saturdays)

Chester Greenwood Day Parade and Celebration/Ear Muff Day -- Farmington, ME, US (celebration of Farmington's most famous resident, the inventor of the ear muff!)

Christmas Candlelightings -- Coshocton, OH, US (Roscoe Village opens for Christmas fun for 3 consecutive Saturdays)

Constitution Day -- Sudan

Coats and Toys for Kids Day -- ME, US (charity drive across the state; even if you aren't in that state, there is probably a charity near you that would love to have your help)

Day of the Ninja -- sponsored by Ninja Burger! with its own website 

Dingle-Fritter, Gooseberry Humple, Tiger-Get-By, LoneFolding, and Zimbor-Quattor's (Multiple Squishing of) Celebration -- Fairy Calendar

Discovery Day -- Haiti

Holiday Happiness -- Upper Arlington, OH, US (Christmas fun for the family at the local public library)

Hollywood Beach Candy Cane Parade -- Hollywood, FL, US

International Volunteer Day for Economic and Social Development -- UN

Jane Addams Day -- Hull House Museum, Chicago, IL, US (sponsored by the American Association of University Women-Illinois

King's Birthday -- Thailand, also National Day and Father's Day (for His Majesty King Bhumibol Adulyadej’s birth anniversary, the founder and "father" of the nation)

Live: Family Christmas at the Benjamin Harrison Home -- Indianapolis, IN, US (Christmas as it would have been during the life of the 23rd US President)

Natchitoches Christmas Festival Parade -- Natchitoches, LA, US (the biggest day in the Festival of Lights in Natchitoches, parade day and the first fireworks of the season)

National Day -- Myanmar

National Sacher Torte Day

Nones of December -- Ancient Roman Calendar; also observed
     Faunalia -- rural festival of Faunus

Norskedalen's Old-Fashioned Christmas -- Coon Valley, WI, US (log home Christmas and fun for all; through tomorrow)

Repeal Day -- US (celebrating the repeal of Prohibition)

Shaker Christmas Fair -- Sabbathday Lake Shaker Village, New Gloucester, ME, US (traditional holiday church fair)

Shalako Festival -- Hopi and Zuni Native Americans (dates of main festivals and dance ceremonies vary by area, but usually the weekend nearest the 49th day after the 10th full moon)

SKYWARN Recognition Day -- National Weather Service, NOAA, and Amateur Radio Operators, working together to report dangerous weather conditions

St. Bassus of Nice's Day (Patron of Nice, France)

St. Nicholas' Eve  -- Belgium; Czech Republic; Hungary; Netherlands; Romania; Slovakia; parts of the UK; special observances include
      Avond -- Leewvarden, West Friesland (St. Nicholas visits and, if you are good, promises to return with trinkets and candies, which are left in waiting shoes)
      Bonhomme Noel -- France (Celebration of "Goodman Christmas")
      Klausjagen -- Arth and Kussnacht, Switzerland (with a procession of mitre-wearing figures by the Lake of Four Cantons)
      Krampuslauf -- Austria (St. Nicholas celebration, which begins the evening before the Saint's day, involving chasing and throwing snowballs at the Krampus, the imp who travels with St. Nick to punish the bad children)
      Zwarte Piet -- "Black Peter", the companion of St. Nicholas who keeps track of the good and bad children, arrives in many areas tonight

Swap a Christmas Cookie Recipe Day -- because it's fun to try new ones

Tamale Festival -- El Centro, CA, US (tamales and arts and crafts, a fun way to holiday shop; through tomorrow)

Tinsel Day -- remember when this stuff used to contain lead?

World Soil Day -- International Union of Soil Sciences 

Birthdays Today:

Frankie Muniz, 1985
Margaret Cho, 1968
Gary Allan, 1967
John Rzeznik, 1965
Art Monk, 1957
Morgan Brittany, 1950
Jim Messina, 1947
Jose Carreras, 1946
Jeroen Krabbe, 1944
J.J. Cale, 1938
Chad Mitchell, 1936
Calvin Trillin, 1935
Joan Didion, 1934
Little Richard, 1932
Otto Preminger, 1906
Strom Thurmond, 1902
Walt Disney, 1901
Bill Picket, 1870
George Armstrong Custer, 1839
Christina Rossetti, 1830
Martin Van Buren, 1782

Debuting/Premiering Today:

"Catskills on Broadway"(Revue), 1991
"I Do! I Do!"(Musical), 1966
"Band on the Run"(Album), 1973 (US release date)
"The Dark at the Top of the Stairs"(Inge play), 1957
"The Abbot and Costello Show"(TV), 1952
"Dragnet"(TV), 1951
"Kejser og Gililaer/Emperor and Galilean"(Ibsen play), 1896
"Symphonie Fantastique"(Berlioz symphony), 1830

Today in History:

Cicero reads the last of his Catiline Orations, BC63
An earthquake in Naples leave about 35,000 dead, 1465
All Jews are expelled from Portugal by order of King Manuel I, 1496
London auctioneers Christie's hold their first sale, 1766
Henry Knox begins the transport of Fort Ticonderoga artillery to Cambridge, Massachusetts, a key to later forcing the British Fleet out of Boston Harbor, 1775
C F Schoenbein obtains patent for cellulose nitrate explosive, 1846
President Polk confirms that gold has been discovered in California, triggering the next year's "Gold Rush", 1848
Daniel Stillson of Massachusetts patents the first practical pipe wrench, 1876
The first automated telephone switching system is patented, 1879
The first electric car makes its debut; it could go 15 miles between charges, 1893
University of Pittsburg makes the first use of numbers on football jerseys, 1908
The American League for Physical Culture is founded in NYC, the first US nudist organization, 1929
The 21st Amendment, which repealed Prohibition, is ratified, 1933
Sister Elizabeth Kenny's new treatment for infantile paralysis receives approval, 1941
A cold fog descends upon London, combining with air pollution and killing at least 12,000 in the weeks and months that follow, 1952
The United Nations General Assembly adopts Pakistan's resolution on security of non-Nuclear States, 1976
Shuttle Atlantis launches world's 1st nuclear-war-fighting satellite. 1988
The Civil Partnership Act comes into effect in the United Kingdom, and the first civil partnership is registered there, 2005


  1. That is a red tape nightmare!

  2. I would write a comment, but my head exploded before I finished reading your post.

  3. Been there and done that. Government red tape can reach far and wide and it does on an hourly basis. I'm glad you got the first hurdle out of the way.

    Have a fabulous weekend. ☺

  4. Dear lord what a fiasco! I'm so glad you finally got to the bottom of it. Congrats to your daughter. I hope she enjoys her time in the army. :)

  5. She was probably being honest, but perhaps she shouldn't have mentioned breaking her arm? People break limbs all the time without complications, but I agree this type of red tape can be extremely irritating.

  6. wow! yay for the hero office manager who wouldn't take no!

  7. Woo boy, that does sound like a headache! Glad it was finally resolved.

  8. Oye. I do not miss being in the paper jungle that was the government. And when they decided to try and not use so much dead tree, the electronic data that had to be input was so timely and thus costly. No win. And some procedures called for things to be kept in triplicate - forever. Do you know we had to have the floor of the records room renovated for extra support due to all the paper?? You could have parked a transport trailer with an elephant loaded on it in that room after.

  9. Beautiful photo, perfect for this meme.