They get you both ways.

A few days ago, Joeh, The Cranky Old Man, was complaining about the trouble he was having with all the regulations and red tape to get a mortgage.

It goes both ways.

This past year, we retired our HELOC (second) mortgage.  They wanted us to reapply in order to keep it, and it wasn't worth all of that, it was easier to pay it off and be done.  (We still have the regular mortgage, and will for a while, unless we suddenly come into some money.  Even then, the order is tithe, save, unsecured debt, then secured debt like a house.  We'd have to come into some kind of a pile of money to get through the first three and still be able to pay off the first mortgage.)

It's not as easy to pay it off as you think, though.  You have to transfer the money into the account from which you will pay it.  That's time and paperwork, because it's in a special retirement account.  (Yes, we decided to use some of the retirement money to get rid of this monkey from our backs.)

Then you pay it off and you think you are done, and they hit you with, "There is an $80 fee to close the mortgage."

What!!!

Yes, after making all of those payments, paying all of that interest, our "customer owned, customer friendly" credit union wants a fee to close the mortgage.  And a bit more paperwork.  After all, they have to know, for sure, that you really want to pay it off.

Why am i sending you all of this money if i don't want to pay it off?  And you want more money from me?

That's right, regulations and more red tape and paperwork.  And more money.  Ugh.

It's over now, and as much as i want to pay off the first mortgage, i'm kind of glad i'm not facing that yet, i'm not so sure i want to know what kind of hoops they will have me jump through.

Happy New Year, everyone!  May 2017 bring you joy and hope and light and life, and no red tape paperwork.


Today is:

Check Your Smoke Alarms Day

Fairy Eve's Year News -- Fairy Calendar

Feast of Sharaf (Honor) -- Baha'i

International Solidarity Day -- Azerbaijan and Azerbaijanis worldwide

Kwanzaa, Day 6, Kuumba (Creativity)

Leap Second Adjustment Day -- if a second needs to be added or subtracted to coordinate the atomic and astronimical time, it will be done today, by the International Earth Rotation Service of the International Bureau of Weights and Measures at Paris, France

Make Up Your Mind Day/Procrastinator's Day -- you have to make up your mind

National Champagne Day

New Year's Eve -- a selection of related observances
     Allendale Tar Barrel Burning/Baal Fire Festival -- Allendale, England (locals burn out the old year by carrying burning tar barrels on their heads, then use them to light one huge bonfire)
     Feast of Father Time -- because he ultimately overcomes us all
     Festival of Yemaya -- Yoruba/Santeria (celebration of the mother of the sun and moon)
     Fire and Ice New Year's Eve Celebration -- Anchorage, AK (fire jugglers, ice carvers, fireworks, and more)
     First Night -- a non-alcoholic alternative to New Year's Eve
     Fravartigan -- Parsi Zoroastrian (celebration to honor the dead through the night)
     Gamlarskvold -- Icelandic traditions; cows gain human speech, seals take on human form, the dead rise, and Elves move house
                obtain gold from the Elves by sitting at a crossroads and waiting for them to pass
                Housewives greet the Elves by reciting the rhyme of protection
                        Let those who want to, arrive
                        Let those who want to, leave
                        Let those who want to, Stay
                        Without harm to me or mine
                Light a bonfire, and "blow out the year" with fireworks 
     Harvest Day Celebrations -- Benin (celebration of the end of harvest season at the turn of the year)
     Hogmanay Day -- Scotland (Auld Year's Night)
     Japanese Observances (a few, at least)
          Joya no Kane -- Japan (ringing out the old year with temple bells; Buddhists believe humans are born with 108 worldly desires which are removed when the bells are rung 108 times)
          Namahge -- Oga Peninsula, Japan (devil appearing holiday; young men dress as demons and run through the town warning children to behave during the coming year)
          Okera Matsuri -- Yasaka Shrine, Kyoto, Japan (Sacred Fire Rite)
          Omisoka Day -- Japan (the second most important day on the Japanese Calendar; tomorrow is the most important)
     Noche de Pedimento -- Oaxaca, Mexico (Night of the Petition)
     Ritual for Iemanja -- Rio de Janeiro, Brazil (seaside rituals for the goddess of the sea and carnal pleasure, followed by a swinging party in the city and on the beaches overnight)
     Samoan Fire Dance -- Samoa
     Swinging the Fireballs -- Stonehaven, Kincardineshire, Scotland
     Universal Hour of Peace -- begins at 11:30pm your local time, welcome the New Year with peace
     Watch Night -- Christian
     World Peace Meditation Day (International observance of one hour beginning 12:00 PM GMT, focusing thought and energy on peace.)

No Resolution Day / Ditch the Resolutions Day -- if you don't want to, you don't have to!

Restoration Day -- Geneva, Switzerland

Seventh Day of Christmas

St. Sylvester's Day (Patron of Feroleto Antico, Italy; Poggio Catino, Italy) related observances
     Saint Sylvester's Day Celebrations-- Belgium, Germany, France and Switzerland
     Silvesterklause -- Urn‰sch, Switzerland

St. Zoticus of Constantinople's Day (Patron of the poor; often titled Feeder of Orphans)

You're All Done Day -- sponsored by something i haven't been able to pin down online called The Long Haul Committee (and it's more like "all done in" if you are like me!)


Anniversaries Today:

Gregory Peck marries Veronique Passani, 1955
Rocky Marciano marries Barbara Cousins, 1950
Bette Davis marries Arthur Farnsworth, 1940


Birthdays Today:

Joe McIntyre, 1972
Nicholas Sparks, 1965
Val Kilmer, 1959
Bebe Neuwirth, 1958
James Remar, 1953
Donna Summer, 1948
Tim Matheson, 1947
Barbara Carrera, 1945
Diane Halfin von Furstenberg, 1945
John Denver, 1943
Ben Kingsley, 1943
Andy Summers, 1942
Sarah Miles, 1941
Anthony Hopkins, 1937
Odetta, 1930
Simon Wiesenthal, 1908
George C. Marshall, 1880
Henri Matisse, 1869


Debuting/Premiering Today:

The London Eye(World's Largest Ferris Wheel), 1999
"Lost in Yonkers"(Play), 1990
"Pirates of Penzance"(Comic Opera), 1879


Today in History:

80,000 Vandals, Alans and Suebians attack the Rhine at Mainz, crossing into and beginning the invasion of Gallia, 406
Byzantine General Belisarius completes the conquest of Sicily, defeating the Ostrogothic garrison of Syracuse, and ending his consulship for the year, 535
Ch'an monk Ho-tse Shen-hui interred in a stupa built in China, 765
James I of Aragon the Conqueror enters Medina Mayurqa (now known as Palma, Spain) thus consummating the Christian conquest of the island of Majorca, 1229
100,000 Jews expelled from Sicily, 1492
The British East India Company chartered, 1600
The first Huguenots depart France to Cape of Good Hope, 1687
A window tax is imposed in England, causing many shopkeepers to brick up their windows to avoid the tax, 1695
Rhode Island establishes wage & price controls to curb inflation: Limit is 70 cents a day for carpenters, 42 cents for tailors, 1776
Queen Victoria chooses Ottawa as new capital of Canada, 1857
The cornerstone is laid for Honolulu, Hawai'i's Iolani Palace, the only royal palace in the US, 1879
Edison gives 1st public demonstration of his incandescent lamp, 1879
Ellis Island (NYC) opens as a US immigration depot, 1890
Brooklyn's last day as a city, it incorporates into NYC (1/1/1898), 1897
Boers & British army sign peace treaty, 1902
The first New Year's Eve celebration is held in Times Square, then known as Longacre Square, in New York, New York, 1904
For the first time a ball drops at Times Square to signal the new year, 1907
The last San Francisco firehorses are retired, 1921
The chimes of Big Ben are broadcast on radio for the first time by the BBC, 1923
Dr R N Harger's "drunkometer," the first breath test, is introduced in Indiana, 1938
The farthing coin ceases to be legal tender in the United Kingdom, 1960
The Central African Federation officially collapses and splits into Zambia, Malawi and Rhodesia, 1963
The AT&T Bell System is broken up by the United States Government, 1983
All official Soviet Union institutions have ceased operations by this date and the Soviet Union is officially dissolved, 1991
Czechoslovakia is peacefully dissolved in what is dubbed by media as the Velvet Divorce, resulting in the creation of the Czech Republic and Slovakia, 1992
This date is skipped altogether in Kiribati as the Phoenix Islands and Line Islands change time zones, 1994
The European Exchange Rate Mechanism freezes the values of the legacy currencies in the Eurozone, and establishes the value of the euro currency, 1998
The United States Government hands control of the Panama Canal (as well all the adjacent land to the canal known as the Panama Canal Zone) to Panama, 1999
The official opening of Taipei 101, the tallest skyscraper at that time in the world, 2004
Italy's ban of plastic bags goes into effect, 2010
A ship abandoned by human traffickers who deliberately set it on a collision course with the Italian coast is brought to shore safely by the Italian Coast Guard with 900 Syrian refugees on board, 2014

Flooded with Difficulty

Just over a year ago, we were finally able to refinance the house.  Multiple previous attempts had not gone as planned, so it was a thrill when it finally went through.

One of the difficulties we had was with flood insurance.

We bought it 16 years ago, when we weren't even required to have it.  Since then, they've changed the flood zone.

What is supposed to happen is that you get to keep your old zone, and pay that rate, if you already had the insurance.  It's called being "grandfathered in," harkening back to the way some former Confederate states tried to use to keep newly freed slaves from voting by passing laws saying you couldn't vote unless you could prove your grandfather had been registered to vote.

We provided the documentation, and everything went well, and our flood insurance is now escrowed and paid and it's all good.

Except when it's not.

The home equity loan is with another bank, and they have decided to pitch a fit.  First they didn't believe we had insurance, even after we showed several proofs, including that the primary mortgage company had paid the bill.

Now they are upset because of the "discrepancy" between our flood zone risk assessment they had done, and our actual zone on our coverage.  Because we are grandfathered in and allowed to keep the old zone and payment, we are having to do pretzel bends and handstands to show them all this.

Over an hour of calls yesterday got some stuff taken care of, but i need to make more calls today, and our insurance agent has to send a bunch of forms to the gov'mint and get them to certify that we are, indeed, correct in all of this.

In the end, i just hope the home equity bank believes the new documentation, or i'm tempted to flood them with me camped out in their lobby until someone there gets it!


Today is:

Armed Forces Day -- Mozambique

Barnesville Pumpkin Festival -- Barnesville, OH, US (pumpkins are just the start of the fun; through Sunday)

Fairmount Museum Days/Remembering James Dean Festival -- Fairmont, IN, US (celebrating Dean and other famous people from Fairmont; through Sunday)

Ghatasthapana -- Nepal (start of a nine day Hindu festival, the longest and most auspicious festival in the Nepalese annual calendar)

Haustmanuour -- Iceland (beginning of traditional Autumn Month, during which all the summer chores are finished, including livestock rounded up, before winter begins)

International Ataxia Awareness Day -- highlighting the difficulties of living with the many forms of ataxia

Join a Cabal of International Bankers Today Day -- internet generated, and only for people without a conscience

Kamarampaka Day -- Rwanda (Republic Day, marks the 1961 abolition of the monarchy)

Math Storytelling Day -- the brainchild of Maria Droujkova

National Comic Book Day -- internet generated, but go read one, they are fun

National Crabmeat Newberg Day

National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims -- US

National Food Service Employees Day -- because everyone wants to eat out once in a while 

National One-Hit Wonder Day -- US, remembering those who had only one hit on the rock charts

National Psychotherapy Day -- US (a day to wear turquoise and encourage education about who psychotherapy can help)

National Teach Ag Day -- US (streamed live from CHS Inc. headquarters)

National Youth Day -- Nauru

Old Holy Rood Eve -- OS calendar Holy Cross Eve, the last day to pick blackberries (after this, the devil poisons them because when he fell from heaven, he landed in a blackberry bush)

Preston County Buckwheat Festival -- Kingwood, WV, US (something for everyone at this fun annual event; through Sunday)

RAINN Day -- The Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network encourages all of us to get involved in stopping sexual violence

Rosh Hashanah -- Judaism (began last night at sundown, through tomorrow at sundown)

St. Cadoc's Day (Patron of the deaf; against cramps, deafness, glandular disorders, scrofula)

St. Finbarr's Day (Patron of Barra, Scotland; Cork, Ireland)

Toad Tempting Day -- Fairy Calendar

Virginia Peanut Festival -- Emporia, VA, US (and you thought all peanuts came from Georgia! come enjoy peanuts and carnival, quilt show and fireworks, the Virginia way; through Sunday)

World Ataxia Awareness Day

World Maritime Day -- UN (this year's theme is “IMO Conventions:  Effective Implementation", chosen to focus on IMO's efforts to carry out commitments made, because making them and then not carrying them out does no good)

World Pharmacists Day -- International Pharmaceutical Federation



Birthdays Today:

Lee Norris, 1981
Catherine Zeta-Jones, 1969
Will Smith, 1968
Scottie Pippen, 1965
Tate Donovan, 1963
Aida Turturro, 1962
Heather Locklear, 1961
Michael Madsen, 1959
Jamie Hyneman, 1956
Christopher Reeve, 1952
Mark Hamill, 1951
Cheryl Tiegs, 1947
Michael Douglas, 1944
Robert Walden, 1943
Juliet Prowse, 1936
Glenn Gould, 1932
Barbara Walters, 1931
Shel Silverstein, 1930
Phil Rizzuto, 1918
Dmitri Shostakovich, 1906
Walter Wesley "Red" Smith, 1905
William Faulkner, 1897
Jean Phillippe Rameau, 1683 (baptismal date, as actual birth anniversary is unknown)
Ashikaga Yoshimitsu, 1358 (Japanese Shogun)


Debuting/Premiering Today:

"Beauty and the Beast"(TV), 1987
"Stepping Out"(Play), 1984
"Winterset"(Play), 1935
"Dorothy"(Comic opera), 1886


Today in History:

St. Ferment is beheaded in Amiens, France, after voyaging there to preach the gospel, 303
The Battle of Stamford Bridge marks the end of the Anglo-Saxon era, 1066
Columbus begins his second voyage, with 17 ships, 1493
Vasco Nunez de Balboa becomes the first European to see the Pacific Ocean from the west coast of the Americas, 1513
The first printing press in the Americas begins operations, 1639
Old Style date; two very accurate clocks are set in motion at the Royal Observatory at Greenwich, England, the start of Greenwich Mean Time, 1676
Ethan Allan, American Revolutionary War hero, is captured, 1775
Benedict Arnold joins the British, 1780
The first all-black university in the US, Howard University, is created by Congress, 1867
Yosemite National Park is established by Congress, 1890
Charles Follis becomes the first black to play professional American football, 1904
Birth of the remote control -- Leonardo Torres Quevedo successfully demonstrates the invention of the "Telekino" and guides a boat from the shore in the port of Bilbao, 1906
Jimmy Doolittle performs the first blind flight from Mitchel Field proving that full instrument flying from take off to landing is possible, 1929*
Central High School in Little Rock, Arkansas, is integrated by the use of United States Army troops, 1957
In a referendum, the people of Norway reject membership of the European Community, 1972
Belize joins the United Nations, 1981
The last of the Magdalene Asylums closes in Ireland, 1996
The Vitim event, a possible bolide (comet nucleus) impact in Siberia, Russia, 2002
China launches the spacecraft Shenzhou 7, 2008
The Wildlife Authority of Uganda announces that, since 1999, the population of some of the animals in the country's game reserves have doubled in population, 2010
King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia announces that women will now be able to vote and run in municipal elections, 2011