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Just over a week ago, Brother-in-Law, The Mouth, became ill. Being that he is Sweetie's twin, he had to share, of course.
So, Sweetie went down for the count with this nasty stomach bug. He never misses church, and he missed church to drive the porcelain bus, to let you know how bad it was.
Then Little Girl fell. She was too sick to go to school, but i had to drag the poor girl out to the doc, so we could say she went, and get a doctor excuse for school.
She's now feeling better, and yesterday said, "I haven't eaten in four days, and I'm hungry!"
That was music to my ears, but i cautioned her to be careful and eat bland food until her stomach was stronger.
Her response? "But I love spicy food! I'll deal with the consequences later!" She then laughed and made a pot of mac and cheese. She was fine.
All this illness in the family has reminded me of some doctor jokes.
When Boudreaux was in college, determined to go to medical school, he was taking a physics class, and he really didn't like the professor very much. His dislike of the man meant that he really wasn't putting forth much effort in the class, and one day he asked the professor, "Mais, we goin' be doctors, how come we got to take physics? How do dat help us in medical school?"
The Professor stared at hime pointedly and said, "It helps us make sure people who aren't smart enough to learn physics don't get into medical school!"
Of course, Boudreaux straightened up his attitude after that, and graduated well from medical school a few years later. After he had gone back to Mamou to set up his own practice, his friend Thibodeaux come to him, and say, "Boudreaux, I'm sick! Can you he'p me?"
So Dr. Boudreaux, he give Thibodeaux a shot, but Thibodeaux don't get no better. So he come back, and Dr. Boudreaux give him some pills. Still no help, so Thibodeaux come back and say, "Please, you gotta do som'pin!"
Dr. Boudreaux tell him "Okay, go home, take a cold bath, den go outside and stan' naked in de garden for an hour."
Thibodeaux, he say, "Mais, it's winter! Dat'll give me de pewmonia!"
"Yes," Dr. Boudreaux said, "but pneumonia I can cure!"
Then Fontenot went to the newly minted Dr. Boudreaux because he had a cough.
"Doctor Boudreaux, you got's to do som'pin about dis cough!" he says.
"Go home an' drink you a quart of prune juice after each meal for de nex' two days," Dr. Boudreaux said.
"An dat will cure de cough?" Fontenot axed wit' surprise.
"Probably not, but you sure gonna t'ink twice before you do cough!" Dr. Boudreaux answer.
Many years later, old Dr. Boudreaux was a wise and respected physician, still with his old Cajun charm, and his accent. He was one of the speakers at a medical conference, and got to talking with other doctors over dinner.
They began discussing which patients were their favorites to operate on. The first doctor at the table said, "I like to work on accountants. You open those guys up, and everything inside is numbered!"
"If you think that's great," the second doctor said, "what about librarians? You open them up, and everything inside is in alphabetical order!"
"You should try an electrician some time," the third doctor chimed in. "You open them up, and everything inside is color coded!"
"What about construction workers and contractors?" asked the fourth doctor at the table. "You know them, they don't worry if the job doesn't come in on time, there's a cost overrun, and you have a few parts left over afterward!"
"No, you's all wrong, I t'ink," Dr. Boudreaux said. "De easiest person to operate on is de politician!"
"Politician!" the other doctors exclaimed.
"Mais oui, t'ink about dat. You open dem up, dere's no heart, no guts, no brain, no spine, an' de head an' de backside be interchangeable!"
Act of Self Determination Day -- Cocos (Keeling) Islands
Animated Cartoon Day -- date of release, in 1908, of Humorous Phases of Funny Faces, often considered the first actual animated cartoon
Army Day -- US (by proclamation of FDR in 1942)
Caballo de Paso Peruano -- Pachacamac, Peru (National Contest of Paso Horses/The National Horse Competition of the native Peruvian horse, the Paso; through the 13th)
California Poppy Day -- California, US (state flower)
Care Sunday / Carling Sunday -- England, 5th Sunday of Lent (possibly from the Old Saxon "carles", or husbandman)
Chakri Dynasty Day and King Rama I Memorial Day -- Thailand
Drowsy Driver Awareness Day -- please pull over and take a nap when you need to
International Day of Sport for Development and Peace -- UN (on the anniversary of the date of the opening of the first modern Olympic Games in Athens in 1896)
International Whistlers Convention -- Tokyo, Japan (The Franklin County Historical Society, Inc., of Louisburg, North Carolina, US, "The World's Whistling Capital" are sponsoring it with the Japan Whistling Confederation)
Jump Over Things Day -- probably started by the same people who brought us Walk Around Things Day on the 4th; as if friends and family aren't looking at you strangely enough after that one
Kamakura Matsuri -- Kamakura and the Tsurugaoka Hachiman Shrine, Japan (parades, festival, and celebrating spring; through next Sunday)
Kanamara Matsuri -- Kanayama Shrine, Kawasaki, Japan ("Festival of the Steel Phallus", a phallic symbol festival, now a big tourist draw and used to raise money for HIV research)
National Caramel Popcorn Day
National Student Athlete Day -- US (Celebrating 27 years of outstanding Student-Athletes)
New Beer's Eve -- US (unofficial celebration of the end of Prohibition; beer became legal to sell again on tomorrow's date in 1933)
North Pole Day -- Peary and Co. arrived there this day in 1909
Plan Your Epitaph Day -- figure out how you want to be remembered, and then live that way! (some sites celebrate this on Nov. 1)
President Ntaryamira Day -- Burundi (anniversary of assassination)
Sorting-Out of the Doggets Day -- Fairy Calendar
St. Sixtus' Day (Patron of Alatri, Italy)
Tartan Day -- Scottish diaspora of Canada and the US (anniversary of the Declaration of Arbroath in 1320)
Teflon Day -- Polytetraflouroethylene resin was developed by Roy J. Plunkett while working for E.I. du Pont de Nemours and Company in 1938
Think About Spring Cleaning Day -- don't do it, just think about it
Twinkie Day -- the snack cakes that will never go away were invented on this day in 1930
Volunteer Recognition Week begins -- sponsored by Points of Light
Candace Cameron, 1976
Zach Braff, 1975
Ari Meyers, 1969
Paul Rudd, 1969
Marilu Henner, 1952
John Razenberger, 1947
Barry Levinson, 1942
Philip Austin, 1941
Roy Thinnes, 1938
Merle Haggard, 1937
Billy Dee Williams, 1937
Andre Previn, 1929
James Watson, 1928
Gerry Mulligan, 1927
Lowell Thomas, 1892
Rose Schneiderman, 1882
Butch Cassidy, 1866
René Lalique, 1860
"Barney & Friends"(TV), 1992
Post-It Notes(first day of sale), 1980
"Entertaining Mr. Sloane"(Play), 1964
"Little Orphan Annie"(Radio series), 1931
Today in History:
Julius Caesar defeats Caecilius Metellus Scipio and Marcus Porcius Cato (Cato the Younger) in the battle of Thapsus, BC46
The Roman army under the command of Stilicho stymies the Visigoths under Alaric in the Battle of Pollentia, 402
Charlemagne confirms his father Pepin the Short's "Donation of Pepin," which had established the Papal States, 774
King Richard I, The Lionheart, of England dies from an infection following the removal of an arrow from his shoulder, 1199
The Scots reaffirm their independence by signing the Declaration of Arbroath, 1320
The Italian poet Petrarch first sees his beloved Laura, 1327
At the Cape of Good Hope, Dutch sailor Jan van Riebeeck establishes a resupply camp that eventually becomes Cape Town , 1652
An earthquake devastates Dubrovnik, then an independent city-state, 1667
Peter the Great of Russia ends the tax on men with beards in that country, 1722
Rama I succeeds King Taksin of Siam (modern day Thailand), who is overthrown in a coup d'état, 1782
The Committee of Public Safety becomes the executive organ of the republic in France, and the period known as the Reign of Terror begins, 1793
John Jacob Astor incorporates the American Fur Company, 1808
Celluloid, the first plastic, is patented, 1869
The city of Vancouver, BC, is incorporated, 1886
The Mormon Temple in Salt Lake City is dedicated, 1893
In Athens, the first modern Olympic Games are opened, 1,500 years after being banned by Emperor Theodosius I; James Connoly of the US becomes the first gold medalist of the modern games, 1896
The Kishinev pogrom forces thousands of Jews to seek refuge in Israel and the West, 1903
Robert Peary and Matthew Henson allegedly reach the North Pole, 1909
Governor Huey P. Long is impeached by the Louisiana House of Representatives, 1929
Mohandas Gandhi raises a lump of mud and salt and declares, "With this, I am shaking the foundations of the British Empire." Thus he starts the Salt Satyagraha, 1930
Launch of Early Bird, the first communications satellite to be placed in geosynchronous orbit, 1965
The American League of Major League Baseball begins using the designated hitter, 1973
Pakistan tests medium-range missiles capable of reaching India, 1998
Rolandas Paksas becomes the first president of Lithuania to be peacefully removed from office by impeachment, 2004
Scientists announce the discovery of three new animal species that spent their entire lives without oxygen, 2010
In England, lawmakers ban the display of tobacco products, hoping the move will lead to a reduction in the number of youths who smoke, 2012
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